RYU-I

Street food is good, but only Street Fighters really appreciate it – Sonic BOOM! Actually, Guile was more my brother’s style. I fight like Ryu – Hadouken! Try to dodge that—back to reality.

Yesterday, a pretty girl, Chun-Li, delivered street food to two great warriors past their prime, Ryu and Blanka. She collected the Halal food on the corner of 53rd Street and 6th Avenue near the MoMA in New York City. Chun-Li weaved through the crowds of people, penetrated the 40 mph winds and finally arrived to the final battlefield, Union Square Park.

For Ryu, this was just another fight. Be aware, eating street food is always a battle. For Blanka, this was altogether a different experience. The uniquely prepared rice and lamb flashed Blanka back to his lonely days in South America after his horrific plane crash. Timid with distant memories, Blanka chose the easy way out. He drenched his food in white dressing and ignored the fire sauce. He would later claim it a mistake. Ryu laughed but didn’t show his disapproval. Gouken taught him to hide his feelings to even those closest to him. Ryu and Chun-Li shared the dangerous meal. Years of fighting and now they fight their battles together. While Chun-Li fed the last grains of rice to the domestic beast creatures of the park, Ryu’s old nemesis made entrance – Sagat!

“This one is for you, Ryu. What is the best nation?” he spoke audibly and with flashcards. Ryu remained silent. “Answer me!” Sagat said, “DOUnation!”

Ryu, Chun-Li, and Blanka were confused. Was this another one of his mind tricks? Such an obvious misspelling could only be intentional … unless Sagat had lost his mind. Could it be???

“Fine,” said Sagat. “Chun-Li, what goes up and must come down?”

“I don’t know,” Chun-Li answered with a frown but smizing (according to Tyra this is smiling with the eyes).

“Down … the best, sexy bum in town,” Sagat replied.

Mysteriously, Chun-Li was somehow defeated and surrendered some spare change. In one last move of desperation, Sagat turned to Blanka and said, “You look bored. You need a girl to sit on you. My sister will do it. She is 500 pounds.”

Ryu took note of Sagat’s new creative battle tactics. He noticed Chun-Li smiling and feeding the beasts. He sat and watched Blanka combat street food without fire sauce. His instincts, his battle know-how, his innate desire to conquer, and his street fighting skills were left sharpened and keen as ever. He left the battlefield and returned to work.